December 17th, 2004

Conan the King (Conan the Barbarian)


Look, I'm a red-blooded heterosexual American male. I certainly understand why the term is "jail-bait" and not "jail-repellent" for certain things. I mean, as an American heterosexual male growing up in the eighties, I just can't ever hear the Cars do "Moving In Stereo" without having a... um... a very.... emotional... uh... moment.

However, I do believe in drawing the line somewhere, and as a result, I have to say...

...what the FUCK is up with
the image of Emma Watson on the cover of the
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban DVD!?!

Du-hude. She's, like, saying, "Hi, Ron."

I'm not joking, either. It's very clear that they presented her to appear very alluring, I guess to catch the attention of thirteen-year-old boys who are just as confused about how they feel about Hermione as Ron is... but seriously, I think the entire world could have done without the nipplage.

Yes, nipplage. It's there. Go look. Apparently it's really cold on the cover of a Harry Potter DVD. It's something that, if it was originally there in the photo shoot (which, given what that costume looks like in context of the movie, I strongly doubt) could easily have been removed by airbrush or Photoshop. As it stands, it is not only emphasized by the light pattern in the image, but also by the composition of the image.

This is not a reproduction of any of the one-sheets I've seen to promote the film, so it looks as though it was prepared exclusively for the DVD (I refer readers to an entry from not too long ago for a look at the artwork that was used, although the images I found don't do it justice), which I actually think is a shame given how cool the European poster for the film was... but also shows that apparently the attempt is to bring a more sexual element to the presentation of these films.

Bad touch. Really.

"Forget my wand!
I'll just poke your eyes out with my nipples!"
  • Current Music
    John Williams: Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban