October 29th, 2006

Gaff (Blade Runner)

Left Turns and Right Guard

ATTENTION MASSACHUSETTS DRIVERS!!!

The skill level of driving I have encountered on my numerous
journeys to your state has been woefully inadequate on a consistent basis.

YOU WILL ALL BE REQUIRED TO PASS AN ADDITIONAL TEST
administered by myself and enforced by suitboyskin

IF YOU DO NOT DRIVE TO MY PERSONAL SATISFACTION,
YOU WILL BE TAKEN TO THE SIDE OF THE ROAD AND EXECUTED!!!


CRITERIA:
  1. Drivers must be able to merge without taking three minutes to do so.
  2. Drivers must maintain a decent distance behind the car in front of them rather than attempting to crawl up their ass.
  3. Drivers must be able to make a decision before an intersection, not halfway through it.
  4. Drivers must have headsets for their mobile phones.
  5. Drivers must know proper curses and hand gesticulations.
  6. Drivers must signal before turns.
  7. Drivers must look both ways before disembarking from a driveway.
  8. Drivers must stay in one lane at a time.

      Here are some images of what suitboyskin
      has done to Massachusetts drivers who failed:




      That is all.



      This is a joke. No actual Massholes were murdered in the creation of this post. Except the one guy with his heart being torn out. That actually happened. What can I say, we were hungry.
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