Joshua Gizelt (swashbuckler332) wrote,
Joshua Gizelt

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The Hunt

Those with a interest in postmodern cultural fusion may be interested in this origami site. WORK SAFE.

When I type, I often find myself unconciously "correcting" words that I don't normally use to conform to words that I do usually use. For example, I had to edit last night's entry because I made a typo, spelling "Nygma" as "Nygman." I rarely ever need to type out the word "Nygma," but my soundtrack mix hobby means that I am often typing out Michael Nyman's name, either as part of a project I'm working on or just an appreciation entry in this LJ. I do this sort of thing all the time.

I'm recording this here because it is a significant moment in the history of my employment at Verizon. My manager had a meeting at the 30th Street Central Office today, which meant that we had to be there this morning at 8:00. I recieved this message from him on my pager voicemail:
Hi, Josh, it's Frank. Just wanted to let you know that I'm running about fifteen minutes late or so, so I'll see you at 30th Street sometime around 8:15 or so. I apologize. Bye.

This is the first time I've ever had a manager call me to let me know they were going to be late.

Oh, and for the record, he showed up at 9:00.

I turns out that they've started monitoring how often the laptops are being used for job purposes so that they can take them away from the techs that don't use them and give them to other techs that might. I'm not in any danger, partly because I do use the laptop for work a lot, but also because for some reason, my computer - and my computer alone - is not being monitored. I went up and down Frank's list, and I didn't appear anywhere on it. It would be one thing if it were the results for one week, but we went through five weeks worth of records and I didn't appear on a single one of them.

From suitboyskin comes this responsed to my entry in which I railed against e-vites:
Twinkie E-vites you to watch Adrienne Barbeau and Katie Holmes mudwrestle!

No.... wait... in light of your new personal policy this would be... oh fuck... what the hell is that word... it's when I think something is a great idea but... oh yeah.. wrong. That would be wrong.

I'll just rescind this evite for you.



Tagged by jenvargas

1) Bold what is true about you.
2) Italicize what you wish was true about you.
3) Add one true thing about you to the end of the list.
4) Tag five LJ friends.

* I miss somebody right now.
* I don't watch much actual TV these days.
* I love olives.
* I wear glasses or contact lenses.
* I own lots of books.
* I love to play video games.
* I've watched porn movies.
* I have been in a threesome.
* I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship. ...but I've had one...
* I believe honesty is usually always the best policy.
* I curse sometimes.
* I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
* I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
* I'm TOTALLY smart.
* I have broken someone's bones.
* I have a secret that I am ashamed to reveal.
* I hate the rain.
* I'm paranoid at times.
* I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free .
* I need/want money right now.
* I love sushi.
* I talk really, really fast.
* I have fresh breath in the morning.
* I have long hair. (I'd love to have long hair, but it just radiates out maniacally from my head.)
* I have lost money in Las Vegas.
* I have at least one sibling.
* I was born in a country outside of Canada. (The United States)
* I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
* I couldn't survive without Caller I.D.!
* I like the way that I look.
* I have lied to a good friend in the last 6 months.
* I know how to cornrow.
* I am usually pessimistic. (But in a very positive way!)
* I have a lot of mood swings.
* I think prostitution should be legalized. (...and Unionized!)
* I think Britney Spears is pretty.
* I slept with a roommate.
* I have a hidden talent.
* I'm always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.
* I have a lot of friends.
* I am currently single
* I have pecked someone of the same sex.
* I enjoy talking on the phone.
* I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
* I love to shop. (music, movies, electronics, that is)
* I enjoy window shopping.
* I would rather shop than eat.
* I would classify myself as ghetto.
* I'm bourgie and have worn a sweater tied around my shoulders.
* I'm obsessed with my Xanga or Livejournal.
* I don't hate anyone.
* I'm a pretty good dancer. (irrational hatred, sorry)
* I'm completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
* I have a cell phone.
* I believe in God. (I don't believe in fairy tales)
* I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
* I've rejected someone before.
* I currently like someone.
* I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
* I want to have children in the future.
* I have changed a diaper before. (yech)
* I've called the cops on a friend before.
* I am a member of the Tom Green fan club.
* I'm not allergic to anything.
* I have a lot to learn.
* I have been with someone at least 10 years older or younger.
* I am shy around the opposite sex.
* I'm online 24/7, even as an away message.
* I have at least 5 away messages saved.
* I have tried alcohol or drugs before. (I like to keep my mind limber)
* I have made a move on a friend's significant other or crush in the past.
* I own the "South Park" movie.
* I have avoided assignments at work/school to be on LiveJournal. (damn)
* When I was a kid I played "the birds and the bees" with a neighbor or chum.
* I enjoy some country music.
* I would die for my best friends. (in fact, I think I have a few times, it's not as bad as everybody thinks it is)
* I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza. (that's NOT pizza)
* I watch soap operas whenever I can.
* I'm obsessive, and often a perfectionist.
* I have used my sexuality to advance my career. (not in this field!)
* I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all.
* I know all the words to Slick Rick's "Children's Story".
* Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
* I watch Spongebob Squarepants and I like it.
* I have dated a close friend's ex.
* I like surveys/memes. (what do you think?)
* I am happy at this moment.
* I'm obsessed with girls. (but they make no sense to me)
* Democrat. (I only vote for them because they're the best way to get things done; I actually think they're a bunch of pussies)
* Conservative Republican. (FUCK NO, do I look like a moron, an asshole or rich to you?)
* I am punk rockish.
* I am preppy.
* I go for older guys/girls, not younger.
* I study for tests most of the time.
* I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I've ever met.
* I can work on a car.
* I love my job.
* I am comfortable with who I am right now.
* I have more than just my ears pierced.
* I walk barefoot wherever I can.
* I have jumped off a bridge.
* I love sea turtles.
* I spend ridiculous amounts of money on makeup.
* I believe in prophetic dreams. (from experience)
* I plan on achieving a major goal/dream.
* I worked at a McDonald's restaurant. (no, but I've worked at a Roy Rogers, does that count?)
* I hate office jobs.
* I love sci-fi movies.
* I think water rules. (so much so that I've devote 80% of my body mass to it!)
* I went to college out of state.
* I am adopted.
* I like sausage. (not that type of sausage, you filthy bastard)
* I am a pyro.
* I love the Red Sox. (I live in New York, so fuck baseball)
* I have thrown up from crying too much.
* I have been intentionally hurt by people that I love(d).
* I love kisses.
* I fall for the worst people and have been hurt every time.(almost)
* I adore bright colors.
* I love Dear Abby.
* I can't live without black eyeliner.
* I think school is awesome.
* I think pigtails serve a purpose.
* I don't know why the hell I just did this stupid thing. (the fact is that I'm a sucker for any meme that doesn't involve Astrology)
* I usually like covers better than originals.
* I don't like multi-textured ice cream.
* I think John Cusack is adorable.
* I fucking hate chain theme restaurants like Applebees and TGIFridays.
* I watch Food Network way too much.
* I love coaching youth sports.
* I can pick up things with my toes.
* I can't whistle.
* I can move my tongue in waves, much like a snake's slither.
* I have ridden/owned a horse.
* I still have every journal I've ever written in.
* I can't stick to a diet. (what's a diet?)
* I talk in my sleep. (I've never heard myself sleep, so I don't know)
* I've often thought that I was born in the wrong (-decade-)century.
* I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.
* Climbing trees is a brilliant pastime.
* I have jazz in my blood.
* I would not be friends with them if they weren't family.
* I wear a toe ring.
* I have a tattoo.
* I love vaginas.
* I can't stand at LEAST one person that I work with.
* I am a caffeine junkie.
* I know who Santos L. Halper is.
* I read trashy romance novels and I am ashamed.
* I love wrestling.
* I am completely tree-huggy spiritual, and I'm not ashamed at all.
* If I knew I would get away with it, I would commit at least one murder.
* I cosplayed or know what cosplaying is.
* I have been to over 15 conventions.
* I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical, the better.
* I enjoy a nice glass of wine with dinner.
* I'm an artist.
* I have a goal to collect every Johnny Depp movie ever made. (Yeah, I really dug The Astronaut's Wife)
* I am ambidextrous. (I do different things with different hands, though)
* I sleep with so many stuffed animals, I can hardly fit on my bed.
* My computer has a name. (The Vermithrax Pejorative)
* If it weren't for having to see other people naked, I'd live in a nudist colony. (it would be all about seeing other people naked, who wants to see me naked?)
* I have terrible teeth.
* I hate my toes.
* I did this Meme even though I wasn't tagged by the person who took it before me.
* I have more friends on the internet than in real life.
* I have lived in either three different states or countries.
* I am extremely flexible.
* I love hugs more than kisses.
* I want to own my own business.
* I smoke or have tried cigarettes. (I quit three and a half years ago)
* I have met a star from ABC's LOST.
* I spend way too much time on the computer than on anything else.
* Nobody has ever said I'm normal. (thank goodness; normal is boring)
* Sad movies, games, fics and the like can cause a trickle of tears every now and then.
* I am proficient in the use of many types of firearms and combat weapons. (I can use a sword, everything else is a coward's weapon)
* I like the way women look in stylized men's suits. (sometimes)
* I don't like it when people are displeased or seem displeased with me. (their problem, not mine)
* I have been described as a dreamer or likely to have my head up in the clouds.
* I have played tennis with my non dominant hand before.
* I have played strip poker with someone else before.
* I read the labels on food, shampoo, and other things just because.
* I have emotional problems for which I have sought professional help.
* I believe in ghosts and the paranormal. (I didn't highlight this because I think most people who do are crackpots, but I definitely believe in the idea of the paranormal, if not how people tend to believe it manifests itself)
* I can't stand being alone.
* I have at least one obsession at any given time.
* I weigh myself, pee/poo, and then weigh myself again.
* I consistently spend way too much money on obsessions-of-the-moment.
* I know what THAC0 means.
* I have a signed Tom Servo head.
* I'm a judgmental asshole. (you all suck!)
* I'm a HUGE drama-queen.
* I was a Spice Girls fan and I'm proud of it.
* I have traveled on more than one continent.
* I sometimes wish my father would just disappear. (he did)
* I have seen every single episode of more than one television show. (with the advent of TV shows on DVD, this isn't such an unusual question anymore)
* I need people to tell me I'm good at something in order to feel that I am.
* I am a Libertarian.
* I can sing songs in languages I don't speak. (that is, if you count the Sanskrit lyrics of "Duel of the Fates" or anything from Conan the Barbarian)
* I can speak more than one language. (I speak a smattering of Spanish and fluent Pig Latin, though)
* I can fall asleep even if the whole room is as noisy as it can be.
* I am ovulating. (is that what that was?)
* I am very confused.
* I believe that everything ends.
* I like happy endings. (I just don't believe in them is all)
* I ask too many questions.
* I am a closet philanthropist.
* I can recite all 50 states in alphabetical order, from memory.
* I would rather read than watch TV.
* I like reading fact more than fiction.
* I have pulled an all-nighter on an assignment I was given a month to do.
* I have at one time considered becoming an assassin using only a knife and a pack of gum. (that's awesome)
* My parents never gave me a set allowance.
* I have no piercings.
* I have spent the night in a train station or other public place.
* I have been so upset over my physical gender that I cried.
* I have more pets than I have good friends.
* I have ridden in a vintage airplane.
* I maintain that Marmite is magically delicious. (what the hell is Marmite!?!)
* I am obsessed with Victorian literature.
* I love to travel.
* I want to go to the Moon and other places in Space.
* I have a talent for complicating people's lives unintentionally.
* I go completely out of control when I'm on my period.
* I hate 'shipper rivalries, though I've been known to participate.
* I've run away from home. (kind of... for two days... my stepdad told me not to come home one day without a job, and so I didn't come home... it really backfired on him because whosamama was apoplectic)
* Sometimes I have thought about committing suicide.
* When the vampire on Buffy said she had a Superiority Complex, but had an Inferiority Complex about having it. I thought they might as well have been talking about me. (no, but "Conversations with Dead People" rocked!)
* I have more than four work shirts. Not all from the same job.
* I wish I could relive certain parts of my life.
* I'm obsessed with being clean. (I'm fastidious about my person, which may sound strange because I'm such a slob)
* I can be very self-conscious and am often too worried about what other people think.
* I've done something illegal more than 10 times. (I'm a baaaaaad boy)
* I'm currently hiding something major about me from most people I know.
* I have yet to have the chicken pox.
* I still think Leonardo DiCaprio kicks ass.
* I've never broken a bone or been stung by a bee/wasp/yellow jacket/etc.
* I still suck my thumb.
* i want to move to Japan.
* I have gone sky-diving, and want to go again.
* There is not a single person alive, who knows my deepest, darkest secret.
* My life is so mundane that liking a reality tv show is my worst vice.
* I'm down with the brown. (is this some reference to shit?)
* I often wonder what my pet would be like if only it were human
* I hate hate hate going to the Doctors.
* I wish I was more of what I want to be and less of what I am.
* I am studying to be a world champion Poker Player.
* I'm scared of growing up. (if ever you think I have grown up, take me out back an shoot my ass)
* I've never seen Lord of the Rings. (only about a gabazillion times)
* I wear Union red on Thursdays.

Tagging the Five:
Tags: memes, work
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