Joshua Gizelt (swashbuckler332) wrote,
Joshua Gizelt
swashbuckler332

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The Tribble with Troubles

Last weekend, I was pulling into a spot in a parking lot when the cement block thingee got caught on the bumper and pulled it loose. While this is a relatively minor issue, it turns out that there is a minor amount of bodywork needed. Very minor, for bodywork, not exactly about to break the bank, really, but it's still $300 I wasn't expecting to spend. I was caught somewhat by surprise by the fact that there would be bodywork needed, and so I'm a little unprepared for two days at my parents' house. The only real issue is that I don't have my cell charger with me. Which is why I didn't call suitboyskin back last night. In case all the rest of you were wondering about that.

Your Day in the Firefly 'Verse by howpaperrusts
Your Name
Your JobMercenary
You got in a fight with
Because youHit on River
but you helped fight
and you hooked up with
But at the end of the day you left Serenity to goTo the Guild
Quiz created with MemeGen!



FIVE FAVORITE VEHICLES TO RUN OFF THE ROAD:
1. People with New Jersey plates.
2. Volvos.
3. Any car with a "Baby on Board" sign.
4. Any car with the Jesus fish.
5. SUVs (who are always surprised that a little tiny Saturn can be so much more aggressive than they).

FIVE WAYS YOU SINNED AGAINST GOD BEFORE LUNCHTIME TODAY:
1. I woke up.
2. I took a shower.
3. I brushed my teeth.
4. I got dressed.
5. I went to work.
(Isn't this a stupid question to ask a dyed in the wool atheist?)

FIVE SEX ACTS YOU'VE INVENTED OR WISH YOU INVENTED:
How the hell am I supposed to know? Fuck off.
People always feel the need to constantly remind me of all the sex that they're having and I'm not. Assholes.

FIVE FAVORITE WAYS TO KILL A MAN:
1. Sword.
2. Baseball bat.
3. Setting him ablaze.
4. Creative use of gardening tools.
5. Psychic attack.

FIVE MOST RECENT GATHERINGS AT WHICH YOU STREAKED NAKED:
The only time I've ever been naked in public was when some we recreated the cover of Dennis Rodman's book on Ho's motorcycle at Tower Records. It was, indeed a life-changing moment for me. Or something.

FIVE MOST HILARIOUS CELEBRITY DEATHS:
1. George W. Bush being hit by a bolt of lightning during a press conference in which he's implying some sort of divine justification for whatever moronic course of action he's committing the United States to this time.
2. Dick Cheney having a heart attack in the middle of the press conference; he collapses saying "All of you can go fuck yourselves..."
3. George Lucas forgetting to take his meds, seeing the Star Wars prequel trilogy for the first time sober, realizing what he's done and paying for NASA to send him up into space where he walks out the airlock.
4. John Woo gets his sleeve caught in a super slow motion camera, and is dragged into it and chewed up by the high-speed mechanism. In slow motion, of course.
5. Hans Zimmer tripping over the leg of one of his Kurzweils, having his balls brutally torn off by his Fairlight and slowly and painfully bleeding to death while his Media Ventures/Remote Control flunkies, having had all of their individual creativity quashed, can only watch and ape his death throws.

FIVE PEOPLE WHO WOULD KILL YOU IF THEY KNEW THE TRUTH:
1. Christians.
2. Muslims.
3. Jews.
4. Hindus.
5. Buddhists.
Tags: memes
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