Joshua Gizelt (swashbuckler332) wrote,
Joshua Gizelt
swashbuckler332

Winter Reveries

  • I saw a life preserver on the side of the Long Island Expressway yesterday. I guess the person using it was eaten by a land shark before AAA could rescue them.

  • A person walking their dog this morning had put the poor beast in what appeared to be a body glove. He looked like a cocktail wiener with legs.

  • Coffee containers are designed with a microscopic crack right at the place where a battery of laboratory tests have proven most people place their lower lips upon.

  • A new bill is being introduced in Congress that will allow me to personally execute people who speak excessively in movie theaters. Republicans want to attach a tax break for Mel Gibson, Democrats want to attach a tax break for Steven Spielberg.
Tags: non sequiter
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