Joshua Gizelt (swashbuckler332) wrote,
Joshua Gizelt

I still think that 'Nude Female Ninjas' would make an awesome movie...

My co-worker has a serious drug problem. He was all drowsy and irate this morning. He said that if he didn't get his goddamn coffee soon, he might kill somebody. Once he got his caffeine fix, he seemed to be okay, but what if there is no coffee? What happens then?

I'm scared.

"Coooooooooooorn!!! Coooooooooooorn!!!"

I have an update on Jim Kirk, University of Iowa grad student situation that waystone appraised me about. He was apparently born three months before the first episode aired and his parents moved to Iowa when he was still very young. So it is just a coincidence.

Ah, well.
They are doing work in the building that I use as my base of operations at work (the 'Work Hole' that often appears in the "Location" field) I feel that the signs that clumsily read:


...should instead read...



MOSTLY WORK SAFE - Mild Language

In addition to being one of the scenes that is closest to the Phillip K. Dick source novel Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, this sequence also contains some of the shots cinematographer Jordan Cronenweth is most proud of... his favorite in the film is the one of Rachel (Sean Young) exhaling her cigarette smoke.
"A very advanced form of lie detector that measures contractions of the iris muscle and the presence of invisible airborne particles emitted from the body. The bellows were designed for the latter function and give the machine the menacing air of a sinister insect. The VK is used primarily by Blade Runners to determine if a suspect is truly human by measuring the degree of his empathic response through carefully worded questions and statements."
– Description from the original 1982 Blade Runner presskit
The Voight-Kampff machine seen in the sequence does not, of course, exist, but its function - separating humans from Replicants - can be seen as being inspired from two primary sources. The first is, of course, the concept of the Turing test with respect to artificial intelligence. In some ways, the VK works in opposition to that idea. Replicants are already known to be intelligent; the film's opening scroll mentions that they were at least equal in intelligence to their creators, which is illustrated later in the film during Roy's (Rutger Hauer) confrontation with Tyrell (Joe Turkel). Furthermore, as the Replicants are generated through genetic engineering, one may question whether or not their intelligence is 'artificial' in the Alan Turing sense of the term.

Another influence might be the so-called "fruit machine," which monitored a subject's pupil dilation in response to pornographic images. The purpose of the device - and there is to date no reported scientific validity to it - was to determine the subject's sexual orientation. This was used during the 50s and 60s to weed out gay people from all government and civil service jobs. It may have been an inspiration for Dick, as the line in the book is "Are you testing whether I'm an android or a homosexual?"

The use of the VK device is limited in the film to this and the opening scene. Otherwise, the Replicants are recognized rather than having been tested for. The scene exists more to emphasize the film's basic question about the differences - or lack thereof - between humans and Replicants (how many of us would pass this so-called empathy test?).

I forgot to charge Artoo last night, so I have no music today. While under most circumstances, I would be ranting and raving, it seems that Monday has seen this and decided not to press the issue. Of course, whenever I get a smooth Monday, I wait for the other shoe (which will invariably have an anvil made up of neutron star matter stuffed into it) to drop.

  1. How long do you spend in the shower?
    About ten minutes or so, unless I'm really enjoying it (which doesn't mean what you might think it means... I don't do that in the shower).

  2. Name something a football player wears under his uniform?
    I would assume they wear a jock strap or something like that. I don't really know, I hate American football.

  3. Name something people hate to find on their windshield?
    Bird shit.

  4. Name something a man might buy before a date?

  5. Whats another word for blemish?

  6. Name a food often cooked in the microwave?
    Easy Mac.

  7. Name a piece of furniture people need help moving.?
    The casting couch.

  8. Name a reason a younger man might like an older woman?
    Did you see what Michelle Pfieffer looked like in Stardust?

  9. Name something a dog does that embarrasses its owner?
    The crotch nuzzle.

  10. Name a kind of test you cannot study for?
    Blood test.

  11. Name something a boy scout gets a badge for?
    First Aid.

  12. Name a phrase with the word 'Home' in it?
    Oh show me the way to go home/I'm tired and I want to go to bed/I had a little drink about an hour ago, and it went right to my head...

  13. Name a sport where players loose teeth.

  14. Name something a teacher can do to ruin a students day?
    Show up?

  15. What is a way you can tell someone has been crying?
    Their wounded soul.

  16. Name a bird you wouldn’t want to eat.
    The Great Bird of the Galaxy. Now, of course. Back in the sixties and seventies, he'd have made some great longpork, I'm sure.

  17. Name something that gets folded.
    Work orders.

  18. Name something a person wears even if it has a hole in it
    Male underwear has a hole built in the front for easy access.

  19. Name something that gets smaller the more you use it.
    A bar of soap.

  1. Introduce yourself.

  2. It's Thursday at noon, where are you usually?
    In the work hole, considering where to get lunch.

  3. What kind of detergent do you use?
    That's between my clothes and my laundromat.

  4. What brand of shampoo is in your shower right now?
    Denorex. It smells like the devil's anus in heat.

  5. Did you ever get into a bar and drink before you were 21?
    Yes. In fact, I never got IDed until a week after I turned 21.

  6. What countries have you been to?

  7. Do you watch MTV anymore?
    I didn't in the first place.

  8. What do you think about Oprah?
    I don't.

  9. You need a new pair of jeans, what store do you go first?
    That place on 3rd Avenue. I don't know what it's called.

  10. Did you ever watch The Hills?
    I tried once, but they advanced at a geological pace (ha ha ha, what the hell are they talking about anyway).

  11. What kind of car do you drive?
    A very cheap 2000 Saturn sedan with manual windows and door locks.

  12. Honestly, is that car insured?
    Yes it is. It is illegal to have an uninsured car in New York State, and they will come after you. I know. Believe me, I know.

  13. Do you like sushi?
    I love sushi.

  14. Have you ever been to Tiffany & Co. or Saks 5th Ave?
    I've walked by them.

  15. Did your parents spoil you growing up?
    Only in so much as neither of them had a chemical dependency.

  16. Do you like roller coasters?
    Not really. I don't have anything against them, but I don't particularly like them, either.

  17. What magazine(s) do you buy regularly or subscribe to?
    Video Watchdog, The DVD-LaserDisc Newsletter, Skeptic.

  18. Do you remember the WB show "Popular"?

  19. When you go out do you prefer to go to a dance club or to a bar where you can chill with friends?
    I like to chill with my friends, but I'm not too fond of either dance clubs or bars.

  20. Who do you think will be the next president?
    I wouldn't begin to guess.

  21. Are you registered to vote?
    Of course.

  22. Do you own an iPod?
    Once again, I don't like iPods because they suck.

  23. Is your bathroom filled with beauty stuff?
    Er... no.

  24. What kind of cologne/perfume do you wear?
    Just my aftershave and deodorant.

  25. Been to Vegas?
    Yes, and in the daytime, it looks exactly like what it is: a gaudy place built by the scum of the earth to feed upon the weaknesses of humankind, surrounded by a trailer park.

  26. How far away do you live from your parents?
    About an hour.

  27. Are you happy with your job?
    It's decent enough, but I know I am capable of more.

  28. What did you get in the mail today?
    Nothing, yet, but there are some CDs I'm waiting for, as well as the replacement battery for Artoo.

  29. How do you like your steak cooked?
    Rare. Delicious.

  30. Britney Spears... ready to have a nervous break down or just having fun?
    She's all show.

  31. Have you ever sat all the way through Gone With the Wind?
    I have to echo Pete's answer on this one: "I could watch that on a kilo of coke and still pass out."

  32. Have you ever been to Mt. Rushmore?
    No, but I have seen North by Northwest on the big screen! That's got to count for something.

  33. Are surveys like the cocaine of online?
    More like the heroin thereof.

  34. What is your favorite candle scent?
    I was going to say something flippant like "candle wax," but I have to admit that there are some that do smell nice. There was this place downtown that had a chocolate one.

  35. Do you believe places can really be haunted?
    No. People are just superstitious.

  36. Are you a patient person?

  37. Have you ever been to NYC or LA?
    I live in New York City, and I've been to L.A.

  38. How many states have you been to where all you saw was the airport?
    None. The one city I had a layover in once - Chicago - I had already been to. And I'm never laying over in O'Hare ever again.

  39. Are you currently planning a trip?
    Not exactly.

  40. Is Ryan Seacrest gay?
    Who is Ryan Seacrest and why would I care what his sexual orientation is?

  41. Do you snort when you laugh?

  42. Have you ever Googled your name and found somebody?

  43. Where's number one in your top 8?

  44. Do you own a gun?
    I don't like guns.

  45. If you could tell your last ex something what would you say?
    Nothing I'd relate here.
Tags: audio, blade runner, film music, memes, science fiction, star trek, vangelis, work

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